


When Nightmares Become Reality

by Phantom_Nightz



Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: Abandonment, Asylums, Blood, Child Abandonment, Childhood Memories, Complicated Relationships, Dreams and Nightmares, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Torture, Injury, Kidnapping, M/M, Memories, Night Terrors, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Portal Hopping, Psychological Torture, Repressed Memories, Restraints, Sadism, Search and Rescue, Terror, Torture, Watcher Grian, Watchers, sedatives
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:03:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 6,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28727043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phantom_Nightz/pseuds/Phantom_Nightz
Summary: Every day is the same. Wake up, build, restock, grind, go to sleep. The cycle repeats over and over every day. Nothing becomes different, stuck in a loop of his own mind.~~~~"Xisuma, I keep having these nightmares about my past and I can't get rid of them. I need your help. Please, I'm begging you."
Relationships: Grian/Mumbo
Comments: 11
Kudos: 86





	1. 1. New Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, author speaking.
> 
> Please note this will be a very violent story. There will not be warnings put at the beginnings of chapters, I am hoping you read the tags as well. It is marked Mature for a reason my friends.
> 
> Warnings may include, but are not limited to;
> 
> Detailed panic attacks, drug abuse, kidnapping, torture, blood, very descriptive violence, unreasonable ways of control, irrational thinking, murder, non-consensual alcohol use/abuse, descriptive violent memories, mentions of depression (cutting, overdose, etc.), and abuse.
> 
> Please keep these in mind while reading and taking your own limits, fears, and sensitivities in question.
> 
> I am not responsible for any injuries regarding the reader mentally or physically, however that may happen.
> 
> Please enjoy the story, this will as well be posted to my Wattpad account as well.
> 
> <3 PN

Taken from his home at the age of four, he was moved from place to place. As he grew older, stronger, more aware of his own life, he realized that where he was, he should not be.

After taken from his home, he was brought to an asylum for three years, found then moved to an orphanage for another year, taken to the town of Yandere where he lived through high school. From there, he was kidnapped by the town murderer and taken to an abandoned asylum. Tortured for years on end until Watchers summoned upon the most miserable being, summoning him from the asylum. The Watchers cared for him for years, until they started to get abusive.

Grian, he sought out refuge in Hermitcraft after running from his past. He has run all his life, when he got to Hermitcraft, he knew from the start that the people there were welcoming. Or at least they were until Grian appeared through a rift that through himself in front of the hermits, specifically their admin.

He was threatened to a sword at his neck after being slammed against a wall, "Who are you and how did you get here?" The admin demanded, dressed in apocalyptic type armour.

"I-I'm sorry! I didn't mean to scare you!" Grian pleaded, "Please, I'm just wanting help."

"Why would I help a _Watcher_? You people ruin lives and destroy servers! You've even kidnapped three of my hermits."

"That wasn't me!" Grian said, "Please, just let me show you. Watchers don't show their faces, please, let me show you that I can be trusted."

Grian could feel the admins' death glare through the purple tinted visor. The admin released his hold.

"You have one chance. Show me your face _Watcher_."

"Okay... Okay." Grian breathed, he brought his hands shakily to his face, slowly taking off the mask, squinting at the bright light.

The admin in front of him saw the scars on his face.

"You've been through hell, haven't you?" He asked crossing his arms.

"Yeah..." Grian whispered, "I don't have anywhere else to go. I was brought here through a rift of the Void. Please, just give me a chance, that's all I ask. I won't harm anyone of your world."

The admin pressed a button on the side of his helmet revealing his face. A large X scar going across it, purple eyes, freckles, and a glare that can pierce through your soul.

"You'll stay here until I can form a meeting with the hermits." His tone strict, strong, and frightening to Grian, "You won't go _anywhere_ without _me_. Is that clear, Watcher?"

"Yes... Uh.."

"Xisuma."

"Xelqua."

Xisuma cocked an eyebrow, "Come with me. You said you came through the Void, right?"

"That is correct."

"I think I know how you got here." Xisuma said, monotone, "I went and put in a request to have a builder who is good with people to come to Hermitcraft. But I didn't think it'd bring a Watcher into my world."

He began to walk away, Grian followed him.

"Are you sure your name is Xelqua? Because I don't remember _anyone_ of that name."

"I've forgotten my real name." Grian said rubbing the back of his neck, "I was put through a lot. I've not known my real name for years."

When the admin suddenly turned around, the helmet formed over his head once more, "What exactly _have_ you been through?"

Grian swallowed the lump in his throat, "Uh.. T-torture, kidnapping, experimentation, a lot more that I would rather not get into."

Grians' voice trembled as he listed some of the major things from his past. He could hear Xisuma hum as he demanded he stay in the small shack as he pulled out his server communicator.

Their server communicators were small wristbands that when brought up, creating a holographic screen as the admin typed out a message. Grian noticed the purple gem in the band and his head rose and eyes widened.

_< Xisuma> It appears that we have an... invited/uninvited visitor in Hermitcraft._

_< GTWScar> What are you talking about?_

_< Xisuma> We just need to get together and talk about this. Meet me in the potential shopping district, everyone._

_< Xisuma> Now._

When the admins' screen turned off, Grian spoke up, frightened to say the least.

"Um, is that a purple gem?"

"Why?"

"I don't mean to intrude but isn't that a Watcher gem?"

The only response he got was a sword to his throat once more after being slammed to the wall.

"You speak _nothing_ of this gem." Xisuma growled, his glare steaming through the visor, " _None_ of the hermits know what I was. You speak a word to them about it, and I will _not_ hesitate to kill you. Is that clear?"

Grian swallowed, "Crystal."

Xisuma released him, "Stay here."

He did as told, that's what he knew to do. Follow orders and you won't get hurt.

Grian was playing with his thumbs when he heard a scream from the forest, he quickly made his way out to the cry.

There on the ground, he saw Xisuma sitting against a tree with an arrow through his shoulder.

"I thought I told you to stay in the shack."

"You aren't in a place to scold me." Grian said, putting up a protective barrier, "Bite your tongue, this is going to hurt to all hell."

Grian grabbed the arrow, "3.. 2..." He ripped it out, causing the admin to gasp, "Sorry, sorry." Grian quickly apologized, "Let me help you."

"I think you've done enough." Xisuma hissed.

"Sit back down, would you?" Grian said, he snapped his fingers and a purple ball illuminated above his palm, "This is painless, you of all should know this."

He let the small ball revolve around Xisuma's arm, it healing the wound immediately.

"You really do know your way around your magic." X chuckled, "Then this'll be good news for you. You've been accepted to stay with us. Each hermit will be wary of you. Do not give us a reason to kill you."

"Do they-"

"No, they don't know you're a Watcher. They're in belief that you were born with your wings."

"Well, that is actually true." Grian said letting down the barrier, "Would you like me to walk you back to your shack?"

"You should probably get started building your own place."

"O-oh.." Grian said, his voice small, "I.. Okay."

_~Three Months Later~_

Grian's base had its first couple of layers completed. He smiled at his work, then proceeded to grimace at the chest monster continuing to grow larger and larger over the time he spent.

Upon gaining the trust of the hermits, or at least most of them, he had made great friends with two, some of the medical team, as well as some of the more hermitty hermits.

Over time he grew a relationship with one, he was happy.

_Happiness._

He hadn't felt this in a long time, he hadn't felt many emotions in a long time, apart from fear. Fear was his strongest emotion. It was the most appeared emotion in Grians' mind.

At this time however, Grian was unlucky. He was currently stood shirtless while he was looking for his white shirt he usually wore under his jumper while in Mumbo's base after spending the night over.

"Oh.. Where is it?" Grian groaned, "I need to find it before someone-"

"Hey Grian!"

Grian jumped and turned around, "Mumbo! Uh.." He covered the left side of his chest, "Now isn't a good time."

"What're you doing?" Mumbo asked getting closer until Grian was pinned against the wall, "And what are you hiding...?"

He moved Grians' hand and the look on Grian's face was petrified.

"M-Mumbo, I-I-I can explain!"

"You're a Watcher! What can there be to explain!?"

"Mumbo, please, just listen to me! I wasn't always one of _them._ I was primarily a captive."

"You've been lying to me! For two months, you've been lying to me."

"Mumbo pleas-"

"Stop talking, Grian. I-"

"No, Mumbo, I was born with wings, yes. But me being a Watcher should be the least of your worries!"

"Then explain."

"I was abandoned by my parents, I was taken to an asylum, I was taken by the Watchers. Hell, Mumbo, I've been to Yandere. In that city there was a murderer, I _lived_ with him. I've been involved with gangs by _force._ Nothing that had ever happened to me I wanted to happen. I've been kidnapped, beaten, tortured, raped, branded. I've been tortured for answers and for control."

"I just can't get past that you've been lying to me for two months." Mumbo said, walking away.

"Mumbo, please-"

"You've said enough. Leave."

Grian went to open his mouth, tears perking at the corners of his eyes, "I... If that's what you wish."

Grian looked back before flying away.

He landed in his base with a hard thud due to not seeing clearly. His eyes full of tears as he couldn't hold them back.

"Why did this stupid mark have to be on my chest!?" He yelled to himself, "Why couldn't it have been somewhere where I could hide it easily?"

With shaking hands, he got up and got out a paper.

_Mumbo,_

_I understand that me being a Watcher is hard for you to comprehend because of me hiding it. But I wasn't the only one who knew what I was. Xisuma also knew._

_I never mentioned it because I was scared it would put your life in jeopardy. I didn't want to endanger you._

_I'm sorry, please forgive me in your own time._

_-G_

He sent it through the mailing system. Then went to sit on the edge of his bed.

Covering his face with his hands, he sighed.

_He's probably going to tell the whole server. No one is going to like me anymore, not that all of them do. Why are relationships so **complicated**?_

He proceeded to lay down, and buried himself underneath his blankets, crying himself to sleep.

_~!!!~_

_He appeared himself in a bright white room. He attempted to look around, quickly realizing that he couldn't exactly move his head. His arms restrained to the sides, legs spread at a forty-five degree angle._

_He heard a snipping noise. Not once, not twice, but over and over and over again._

_His wings were being clipped._

_He couldn't struggle. He tried speaking, but it only came out as an incoherent squeak._

_The snipping continued. One by one, feathers being clipped and ripped out of the wings._

_He suddenly couldn't breathe. Something furry filling his mouth, as sudden as it came it left._


	2. Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover

Since their fight, Grian has been isolating himself in his futuristic base. He had muted his communicator after getting many messages threatening his life.

Yeah, he would respawn. But spawn killing can permanently kill if done enough times.

Grian was only clearing out some chests when his communicator buzzed violently, alerting him of an announcement.

_< Xisuma> Meeting. My base. Now. Everyone is required to attend. No exceptions._

Grian sighed and flew off to Xisuma's base. He was worried about what all the hermits were going to say, how they were going to look at him, what they would do to him.

Grian quickly found that he was the last to arrive, considering his base was a decent way away, it was expected.

He kept his head down as he sat closest to Xisuma as he talked.

"Look, we all have concerns. Bu-"

"HE'S A WATCHER. YOU KNOW HOW WE FEEL ABOUT WATCHERS."

"THEY AREN'T WELCOME HERE."

"IT NEEDS TO GO."

Grian listened to why all the hermits wanted him gone, but being called an 'it' was really starting to kill. After another few screams of being called a 'thing' and anything related Grian finally got tired of it and slammed his hands on the table as he stood.

"Me being a Watcher should be the _**LEAST**_ of your worries! If I WANTED to harm anyone, don't you think I would have done it by now!? I'm not here to destroy your world, I'm not here to harm or permanently kill anyone, I'm here because I was brought here through a rift." Grian said, his voice starting to break, "You can't just judge someone by the _one thing_ you hate about them! You don't know what they're going through or what they HAVE gone through."

"Grian-"

"Shut up, Xisuma." Grian said, "This needs to be said. Your world is Watcher-Proof. There's a code barrier preventing them from getting in. Coming through the void is something different. You all found out what I am and you judge me by it. But that is the _only_ thing you guys know. Do you know my story? No, none of you do. Not even Mumbo knows the half of it! So if you know my story, please, say it."

The hermits stayed quiet, even Xisuma stayed silent.

"That's what I thought." Grian continued, taking a breath, "Yeah, my powers are scary, yeah they can be used to kill. _But not every Watcher is the same._ Some of us are caring, some of us have morals, some of us have feelings. Some more than others."

Grian looked at Xisuma, "I had my emotions beat out of me when I was a child. All I knew was fear, pain, and regret. When I was told to follow an order I did it. Not because I wanted to, but because I was scared that I would be beat to the point of unconsciousness. And that didn't only happen once. It happened almost every day. When you judge someone by the one thing that you know, they've probably gone through worse. You can't just let your past define who and what you become."

Grian stormed out of Xisuma's base. Leaving the hermits quiet with no words.

Xisuma had never seen that side of Grian. He blinked his eyes and stuttered against his words. But then he just stop talking, he and Mumbo walked out.

"I.. Uh.. Stop glaring at me guys." Xisuma stuttered, "We all agreed to let him stay. B-"

"That was before we knew what it was."

"Grian is not an it, Doc." Xisuma growled, "He's not like anyone else. He-"

"You barely know the kid! What can you possibly know abou-"

"BECAUSE HE'S LIKE ME." Xisuma shouted, "A Watcher, excommunicated, seeking refuge and love from a life they didn't want. You guys accepted me, what makes Grian any different?"

"We've known you for years. We've only known the Watcher for three months. What if he's gathering intel on us?"

"He wouldn't. He has morals, he has emotions, he's just like rest of us. Only slightly different."

"Slightly? What is he? Do _you_ even know him?"

"I know that I've given him a chance. You guys should too, instead of judging him for being a Watcher." Xisuma scolded the hermits, "Once you get to know him, he's actually a really nice kid."

Xisuma adjourned the meeting and flew off to find Mumbo.

Fortunately for him, his first guess was correct. He landed atop the entrance to Grians' massive futuristic base and saw Mumbo on the bottom layer.

_~!!~_

Mumbo ran his hand through his hair, quickly becoming more and more worried about the whereabouts of Grian.

_He couldn't have gotten far... But then again, he is part Watcher. He has a way of getting around. Grian where are you?_

"Mumbo!" Xisuma called from the entrance to Grians' base, "Mumbo, where's Grian?" 

"I don't know!" Mumbo said when Xisuma flew down, "When I followed him and got here, he was gone." 

Xisuma's face became full of worry. He couldn't think on losing another hermit, even if this one was troublesome.

The two looked around, Xisuma muttering something quietly under his breath. The purple gem on Xisuma's communicator started glowing, the closer he got, the quicker he realized that Grian more than likely wasn't with them, because he quickly found Grians' server communicator under his bed. 

"Mumbo." Xisuma said picking up the device, clutching it tightly in his palm, "He's gone."

"He can't be that far gone though." Mumbo said, "We need to find him."

"I know, and we will." Xisuma said, he pulled out his left hand, ungloved it, then summoned a purple flame that illuminated and floated just about his palm.

"That doesn't... Hurt you?"

"No, but my armour isn't fire proof." Xisuma said as he let the flame analyze the base for any other magical presence.

"What is that supposed to do?"

"It'll help me find Grian. With the flame, it can show magic, or it can show devastation." He looked around the base. What he saw was a lot of marks from the Watcher magic the two used and silently winced, "There's a lot about Watcher kind that people don't know. It's why the Watchers are put away from the player worlds."

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a continuous line of magic going down to the ground. He motioned Mumbo to follow him down.

"Grian, oh thank Void." Xisuma said relief in his voice, "What're you doing down here?"

"Grian, I was worried." Mumbo said, "What are you doing, look at us."

Grian sighed and turned around, "I'm leaving. I'm clearly not welcome here, so I'm doing something that'll make everyone happy."

"Grian, that-"

"Xisuma." Grian interrupted promptly, "You haven't been called an 'it', you haven't been called a mistake, you've not been tortured, what makes you think you know me? If anything, Doc was right. You don't know me. Nobody really does."

"Grian-"

"Nobody likes a Watcher Xisuma! I heard what Doc said because my powers give me advanced senses. I could hear you guys until I got to my base. I _chose_ to stop listening. I didn't choose to let Mumbo know that I'm a Watcher, it was a wrong place wrong time situation." Grian sighed before continuing, watching as Xisuma and Mumbo both waiting for him to continue, "I've been running all my life. Hermitcraft was the first place I've felt loved in a long time. I was stupid to believe that I could stay here and not be judged."

"Grian, people are going to judge you, no matter who you are."

"I am aware of that. But there's a lot of things I didn't choose." Grian said walking close to the two, "I didn't choose to become a Watcher, I didn't choose to be put through shock 'therapy', I didn't choose to live and force to love a murderer, _I didn't choose to be born._ But what I did choose... Was to stay here. You didn't have to take me in, but you did. You took a chance on a complete STRANGER."

"And it was the best chance we've ever given, Grian." Xisuma and Mumbo said in unison, "You're not just a Watcher, to us you're our friend."

"Hell, my boyfriend even." Mumbo added, "Our point is, G, is that you aren't what you think you are. You're so much better than what your past tells you."


	3. My Past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is set in Grians' POV.

"My story isn't what you think it is." I said, I could feel my eyes glowing purple, "My past may not have determined what I am now, but at least I'm not where I was."

"That's true Grian, tell us your story. Let us know what you are." Mumbo said as he and Xisuma pulled me away from the fire burning in front of me, " _Let_ us know you."

"Fine. But it's not a happy story."

_~Age 4~_

I wasn't in the best place, my parents abandoned me when I was an infant. When I was found on the streets, someone called cops and reported me missing.

But no one ever listened.

I was just a dumb kid on the street who ran away from home.

"Please, I'm telling you the truth!" I cried, trying to say why I was on the streets, "I don't know where I am, I don't know where home is because I don't have one, and I just need food."

"A winged thing like you should be hunting for your own meals."

No one ever understood me. I was always the reject until I was brought to a small orphanage after the London police found out that I truly was parentless.

_~Age Seven~_

Three years in an orphanage and I've finally been adopted by a family in London. They helped me through schooling, they loved me, but I couldn't feel love. From a young age I've learned to not get attached to someone I could lose.

Eventually, I did lose this family like I did my own.

They tossed me to the streets, they beat me until I was to fall unconscious.

_~Age 15~_

As time went on, I realized high school wouldn't be any better.

When it became about middle of year three, the two friends I knew turned against one another. Taurtis was killed by Sam, I was forced from there to live with him, the murderer of Yandere. He made me wear Taurtis's clothes, eat plastic, and he would occasionally violate me at gunpoint, even though his specialty was a knife. He assumed my fear was me liking what he was doing to me.

When I ran, I was put into an asylum. Shock therapy was their idea of _helping_ me to forget what happened in the past. It didn't work well. After those years, undergoing four treatments every week, it caused a strong ase of depression that I couldn't get rid of.

_~Age 19~_

The end of Evo was hard on me. I watched as all my friends were killed in front of me.

The landscape that was once a happy world, now disintegrated with purple fire. In the middle of the field stood two tall winged beings, they both had blonde hair.

I wasn't sure of what made me walk towards them, but I was cautious of them as my steps slowly made my way in front of them.

_"Hello young child."_

"U-uh... Hell-hello.." I stuttered as the two in front of me spoke without moving their mouths.

_"Come with us, let us save you."_

"I.."

_"You don't have a home young one. Allow us to help you. You've suffered loss, pain, and abandonment."_

"Loss and abandonment are kinda the same... Who are you?"

The being kneeled down to me, putting her hand on the left side of my chest, _"We are Watchers, we look over player worlds, protecting them. Now you're one of us now. Come, live with us. We will show you how to be strong."_

She put a mask on my face and I could feel my body being overwhelmed with too many sensations.

The being held out her hand to me, offering her help to me.

Without knowing any better, I took her hand, accepting her offer of help.

_~Age 23~_

The torture I endured for the past four years had begun to take a toll on my mental health.

The Watchers knew how to get answers out of someone. I watched as they destroyed worlds in front of me.

"I thought you protected worlds!"

_"We destroy those worlds who are not following the orders that we set for them."_

"What!?"

_"You need to learn to use your powers to take care of a world."_

"Then send me to a flat world! I can show you what I can do!"

_"Very well, young one. We'll send you to a flat world."_

_~!!!~_

_"From there I used my powers to create rather than destroy. The super-flat world I was in that was once a small square of rough grass, became a world of mountains, hills, biomes, and much more. I created life in a world that was my image."_

_"I chose five players to stay there. Two of which, unknowingly would move on to become part of your season four server. GoodtimeswithScar and RenDog. I was happy for them when they knew they were going to move on to a different server, I granted them access to a portal so they could meet Xisuma."_

_"When I found Scar, he was alone in the woods with Ren. I appeared myself to them and invited them to my world. I let them live the way they wished. There were no rules, no expectations, no do's and don't's. Players were there to live freely and enjoy their lives."_

_"I interfered with them none. I observed like I was supposed too. The players were happy, when I allowed Scar and Ren to leave, that's when the Watchers decided to fully punish me for what I had done. For not setting rules, for not appearing to the Watchers' demands and figures, I was punished severely."_

_"They broke my left wing, I had to care for it myself. They lashed my back, put into a sensory deprivation chamber, but since I wasn't in good health, I suffered inside. I couldn't think about anything or anyone. I didn't have anyone to think about."_

_"When I came to Hermitcraft through the Void rift, I knew I would be in danger, because Void rifts are only sent out through requests from people of a Voided life."_

_"Watchers can be excommunicated, we can look for refuge, but no one has to let us in. I watched over Hermitcraft for two years before stopping. It's rare when people who know what a person is and allow them into their world. Especially if that person is Watcher or has Watcher blood."_

_"We're different. And people don't like different. Especially if we're a Watcher. If you see things in a light that is good, and you want to **save** players, then you're considered traitor and are either excommunicated, which is lucky, or you could be put through what I was."_

_"I almost died to their hands more than once. I viewed life as precious... And something that needed protecting. I wouldn't kill, I wouldn't hurt or harm any life form. Because I didn't find it morally right to kill something that didn't harm me or didn't deserve it."_


	4. A Prisoner Of My Own Mind

"So that's why you act the way you do..."

"My point being, is that people change, guys." Grian said, his voice gotten progressively softer as he spoke, "You can't stereotype every Watcher. Yeah, you've known Xisuma for years on end, but that doesn't mean you should treat me as if I was going to destroy your world. I'm a prisoner of my own mind."

"Gri.. We.. We didn't realize-"

"Because you never gave me a chance to speak my side. You didn't understand what I was and why I was doing it because you wouldn't let me explain. My memories can act as dreams, nightmares even. It's one of my powers that I absolutely despise."

"Grian.. We.. We're sorry."

"It's fine Mumbo."

"But it's not. We treated you terribly when we found out, it's like the last three months didn't matter."

"And now that you know my story, you'll probably treat me differently."

"I'll explain to the other hermits why you've done the things you did." Xisuma said, "Because you're like me in a way."

"Xisuma, with all due respect, I am _nothing_ like you." Grian replied, "You were only excommunicated and exiled. I ran from the abuse and torture. I'm a weapon, I have powers that _they_ need to take over the Minecraft realms."

Mumbo and Xisuma were silent.

"I need to be with Xisuma alone." Grian said, Mumbo nodded and left, "Xisuma, they're much more powerful now than when you were still with them. They're able to force any Watcher's power that they desire with a touch. For the Watcher on the receiving end, it's agonizing pain, suffering. It's torture."

He held out his hand, Xisuma put his on top and a purple ring appeared around their hands. Grian's eyes both glowed purple as he let Xisuma into his head.

_"I have memories missing going back a near decade."_

A memory of two Watchers stood in a large hall appeared in front of the two.

_"The smaller is me."_

_**"What are they doing?"** _

_"Using me. They were attempting to use my body as their own experimental vessel."_

The larger Watcher kneeled to Grian's height and exposed Grian's chest. All the small Watcher did, was let it happen.

**_"You're just letting them do this to you?"_ **

_"I didn't have a choice. It was either this, or they kill me by picking my brain."_

A new memory, it showed Grian unconscious strapped tightly to a table. Electro node pads against his temples, a breathing tube in his mouth.

_"This is where my entire life spiraled. Memory loss at every corner. This is what the medical people considered Electroshock Therapy."_

Grian reversed the memory to before they started the 'treatment'. He guided it closer to them.

When the memory of Grian opened his eyes, he was strapped tightly to a table, unable to get his bearings. He tried thrashing against the restraints and tried screaming. But was unable to achieve doing so because of a ball gag in his mouth. 

He let out a weak whimper as someone of the asylum walked up to him. A mask covered half of the persons' face, not that he could see clearly anyways, but the person reached up to him bringing up a syringe.

Before the doctor inserted the needle, he looked at Grian and put one finger to his mouth, shushing him as he roughly grabbed Grians' upper thigh and injecting the liquid.

He couldn't think, he couldn't breathe properly, he couldn't even figure out where he was, or who was doing this to him. 

The small hermit felt his heart hurting as the liquid made its way through his blood stream. He tried desperately to call for help. But alas it was no use, sounds muffled from the gag.

The only thing he could comprehend was the distant sounds of lights buzzing before his consciousness became nothing but a black room.

The medical assistant then removed the gag, and placed in the breathing tube and the nodes onto his temples.

_"I tried desperately to get help. Every day was the same. Wake up, build, grind, torture, go back to sleep. Then repeat the process on the next day."_

_**"That's..."** _

_"Terrible. I was a prisoner of my own mind, still am to this day."_

Grian dismissed the memory, and the two were out of Grian's head.

"Don't let them do to you as they did to me. It will kill you."

"I.. Grian-"

"Don't. I don't need pity." Grian walked to the hole that he had jumped in from and flew out, Xisuma following close behind.

Everyone left Grian alone for the day, leaving him to his ways. They'd not wanted to disturb him as he collected himself.

With the Watcher proof code barrier, he lit his hand in the purple flame as the night came upon them, the torches on the ground turning the same purple colour. It illuminated the base, though this night he heard someone land at the entrance to his base.

"Everyone judges the flame because it's different. But for me, the flame is a symbol of my imprisonment. Forever a prisoner of my own subconscious, never to be free of this curse I live." He spoke with a gravelly tone, then looked towards the hermit, "It's why you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover, Doc."

"How'd you know I was here?" Doc asked landing and walking to him, "I didn't make any noise when I landed."

"On the contrary, I hear and feel everything. No matter how soft you may land."

"Okay.. Uh, look, Grian... I just wanted to apologize for my actions and remarks earlier. It wa-"

"Stop, there's no point in apologizing for something I've already forgiven." Grian interrupted, extinguishing the flame, ultimately putting out the torches on the ground, only for them to relight their normal colour, "Not all fire is the same, not all people are the same. What happened with Scar and Cub, had nothing to do with me. I bid you good night, Doc."


	5. Chapter 5

While Grian was sleeping, his nightmare became more real. He could feel his body reacting on the outside.

His body seized with the nightmare on every shock of electricity going through his head.

_Helpless_

_Weak_

_Small_

_Tiny_

His strength left him as he went deeper into his subconscious. Deeper into the memory itself. He felt as if he was actually there in the room.

He went too deep, he couldn't get out of it, he couldn't wake up.

_~!!!~_

Xisuma flew into Grian's base, "Hey Grian? I wanted to see how you're doing... Grian?"

Xisuma heard a creak, along with a loud thump. he ran to the source of the crash.

"Oh Void, Grian!" He shouted quickly running over to the thrashing hermit, "Grian, wake up!"

Grian's entire body seized, Xisuma used his own powers to try and wake him up.

"C'mon... Wake up." He mumbled, a strong pulse sent him flying into chests as Grian awoke, "Ow.."

"X!" Grian shouted running over to him on weak legs, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, are you okay? You were in like some form of sleep paralysis. I had to pull you out with my magic." Xisuma replied rubbing his head.

"I will be, eventually." Grian pulled him to his feet, "Xisuma, I'm sorry."

"Grian, that wasn't exactly you, it was also partially me. Sleep paralysis in Watchers are dangerous. What happened to you?"

Grian swallowed, "You remember that ECT memory I showed you? It got too real for my own good."

"Would it be weird to tell you I could tell?" Xisuma asked, when Grian didn't respond, Xisuma immediately went to say, "I'd like to know more on how your powers work. Maybe I can help."

"I.. I don't know, X."

"I'm saying I can probably help you control it."

"I know. But sleep paralysis isn't exactly something you can control in a Watcher because our memories and things are all attached to our heart and mind."

"Not what I'm getting at kid. What I'm saying is that I can help you."


	6. My Nightmares Are True

_It's been a few weeks._

_The server has been quiet around me._

_I heard the hermits talking about what to do with me._

_They voted for me to stay._

_The only few that weren't happy were the stubborn headed ones._

_Doc, Iskall, Cub, Joe._

_I constantly see them around me. Making sure I've not broken or destroyed part of their world._

_I understood their worry._

_But I've assured them that their code wall was reinforced with me here._

_Other than that, everyone is nice._

_Mumbo and I got back together._

_We're happy._

_I've not hidden any secrets from the hermits._

_I've only told them truth._

_I had nothing to hide._

_Except the scars on my back._

_Those I've hidden._

_They only believe that they're cruel._

_The hermits don't know the half of it._

_Because all the nightmares are true._


	7. Move To Escape

_We moved to the next season._

_We spawned on the smallest island._

_With our starter bases, I connected Mumbo's and mine._

_We're hobbit buddies._

_Tomorrow, Scar and I go to the End to grab elytra._

_Here's to hope nothing goes wrong._

_**~*~** _

__

__

_My nightmares have come back._

_There seems to be no end to it anymore._

_"Xisuma, I keep having these nightmares about my past and I can't get rid of them. I need your help. Please, I'm begging you."_

_I begged him for help._

_I pleaded._

_But ever since my End Bust with Scar, it's been worse._

_Every day is the same._

_Wake up._

_Grind._

_Stock._

_Sleep._

_Repeat._

_I can't change the past._

_I can't change my circumstance._

_But I can change where I go._

_What I do._

_How I do it._

_Who I do it with._

_But what happened in the End..._

_What happened with Scar..._

_What happened **TO** Scar.._

_**Ĭ̸̘͉̫͈̲̺̯̰̝̇̅͐͂̕t̶̞̻̩͍̖̒̈́͘͜͠ ̵̨͎̗͇̠̘̾͝w̸̺̯̎̌͘ͅa̷̛̫͇̲̝̾s̵͉̝̪̄́͂͂͛̔̅̈͘͝ͅ ̵̜͉͚̜̔̄͆͗̎a̸̳͎͆̔̔̈̈̃̓̅̅͝l̵̛̮͈͐̓̊͌́͋͑͜l̷̝̣̞̖̣͖͚͖͔͛̒̚ ̷̧̪̮̥͋̎m̵̧̟̩̭̞͋͊̽̅͗̽̓̕͠ý̴̹͕̹̈́̊̇̀̌͒̔͌͝ ̷͚̭͛̋̃̋͌͠f̴͙̻͚̳̹̳̊̈̏̕͝a̸͚̮̺̬̱͎̎͝u̸̧̡̨̖̺̖̦̗͚̒͆̍͆̿̂͘͜͠͠l̴̯͔̈́̔̋̃̕͘͝ẗ̴̨̛̤̟͙̼̮̭̺́̒͘͜.̴̜͒̈́̓͠  
** _


	8. Chapter 8

_Scar asked me to fly into the void and grab extra elytra sets._

_I didn't necessarily have a problem with it, but that also meant leaving Scar alone on the main island near the main portal back._

_I told him I didn't want to leave him alone, but he insisted that I fly off and get the set._

_I should have trusted my instincts._

_I should have just stayed._

_He fell in the void when I was coming back._

_I couldn't reach him._

_I couldn't save him._

_I was just too far away._

_So I stood on the platform in shock and not moving, scared of what happens in this new world._

_GTWScar fell out of the world_

_< Iskall85> GRIAN WHAT DID YOU DO  
_

_< Docm77> I swear, Grian. If you did something to Scar, I will murder you._

_< GTWScar> I'M FINE GUYS. We have respawn mechanics. Nobody permanently dies unless it's by suicide or constant death loop._

_< Tango> Such as Ravagers. Those hurt._

_< Xisuma> Doc, Iskall, stay off of Grian's case. Got it? He's under my protection and authority, remember?_

_I sighed in relief when I saw Scar's name pop up._

_They did have respawn, it was good._

_Season seven is a whole different ball game._


End file.
